just Jill.: July 2011

19 July 2011

30 by 30:

here is my list so far - obviously it is a work in progress. feel free to add your suggestions. i will be adding to it over time, as i am inspired.

1. visit a new state (progress on my goal to travel to all 50 states, not counting just driving thru a state)

2. make bbq pulled pork

3. learn to play the guitar (learn more than the few chords i know now, and play them decently well)

4. go see the mets at citi field

5. read the chronicles of narnia

6. train to run a 5k - possibly the susan g. komen race for a cure in the spring

7. bake an apple pie with self-picked orchard apples

8. picnic in a park, picnic basket and all

9. go to the top of the rocks, top of the empire state building, or top of the statue of liberty in nyc

10. build a snowman - i am sure i did this as a kid, but it has been a long time

11. take up kickboxing at a local gym or martial arts studio

12. weekend trip to boston with my sisters

13. get a haircut (not just a trim) / wear my hair down for those who always beg me to

14. move into the downstairs bedroom, finally - this requires some cooperation from my parents

15. write each of my nieces/nephews a letter for their "baby" books

16. go to a comedy club - preferably see brian regan or kevin james

17. learn to make mom's lasagna, the best lasagna i have ever had, despite our non-italian roots

18. ice skate on wollman's rink in central park

19. read thru the old testament

20. volunteer time/abilities to help a victim (or more than one) of hurricane irene

21. invite someone to church with me (someone who doesn't usually go to church)

22. write a letter every month and send one package to my world vision child, yonatan in the dominican republic

23. go on a camping/kayaking weekend

24. get a real philly cheesesteak and spend a day (at minimum) in philadelphia

25. meet up somewhere with friends (emo and val) for a 30th birthday celebration/reunion - anyone else turning 30 care to join? this may have to happen after my technical birthday, but considering we will be coming from new jersey, michigan and washington state, i think some flexibility in that should be allowed

*26. play and complete an entire game of monopoly (i don't think i have ever done this) - 08/25/2011 with jason formicola, frank & erica delalla

27. attend a symphony orchestra concert

28. host/coordinate (using my parents house of course) sunday dinner with the family once a month

29. participate in and sell things at a fall family yard sale

18 July 2011

in progress...

i am/will be working on a list of 30 things to do before i turn 30. however, i am also open to suggestions (particularly from those who have already turned 30 and have great advice on this matter). or should it be things to do before and during my 30th year, therefore giving me up until i turn 31 and offering more time? that is also flexible, but i think i should stick with 30 things to do before i turn 30. why didn't i start this earlier seeing as i only have about 8 months to go??!!

lacking a thesis...

if someone stopped you right now at this very second and asked you to share what exactly is on your mind, what you are thinking, would you be able to do it? (let's assume that the person asking you is someone you are close to and comfortable sharing such information) i'm not very good at this. i think i have moments where my mind is juggling dozens of different "ideas" at once and it is hard to separate any individual one to share. then there are moments (much less often) when i simply am not thinking about anything. i like these moments. i think it is at those times that i am most living in the present - i can just be there in that time and place without my head getting in the way.

i have been unemployed for several months now. sounds wonderful and enjoyable to some, and of course there are many times when it is and has its advantages. but at the same time, especially for someone like me who likes to feel productive and purposeful, it can leave me feeling a bit empty and anxious. for the most part, though, it has allowed me to have a lot of moments where i am not thinking about much of anything and simply being and living in the here and now. but that doesn't mean that my mind has been without thoughts. while it can be hard for me to separate and pull out individual thoughts, i will try to dig out a few...

- i didn't have to travel to places like kenya and ghana to realize how blessed and privileged i am. i am not just referring to financial blessings or opportunities but also recognizing how good and easy i have it. sometimes i am overwhelmed by all of life's many blessings. i don't have to look very far to see people around me who are struggling with very real and deep hardships. this is not to say that i don't have struggles or haven't experienced difficult times of my own. but what do i have to complain about? i know that these blessings are from God and are given to me to be used for His glory. i cannot simply recognize them and be thankful for them (though it is important that i do that as well). i need to use them. am i using them as much as i could?

- God knows what He is doing. i am 29 years old and am only just now going back to school and starting a program that will eventually (if it is God's will) lead to my career. sometimes i feel like jonah - avoiding what God is calling me to, usually out of fear and insecurity, but sometimes distracted by other temptations. i don't consider the past few years at all a waste of time - i don't regret them. but it feels good to be heading on a track that i feel God calling me to. every day i need to throw my plans and desires away and align them with God's will for me. only then do i truly feel content.

- God is bigger and greater than i realize. last week jay and i were laying out on a hammock as we were admiring the starry night sky when i mentioned to him a video by louie giglio called 'indescribable'. louie shows incredible images of the stars and galaxies and other phenomenons in outer space while talking about our amazing Creator. so on saturday we borrowed a dvd from liesl called 'how great is our God', the follow up to 'indescribable'. he shares that if the earth were a golf ball, the sun would be a ball 15 feet in diameter. he moves on to a few other stars even bigger and grander, all pointing to how big the universe is, far beyond what we imagine. it takes approximately 8 minutes for the suns light to reach us at earth. does that sound like a lot? it is actually very short in time considering how many light years away the sun is from our planet. my mind is still grasping the information that louie shared. he also talks about laminin, a protein in the body that holds things together. if you look up an image of laminin, its structure is in the shape of a cross. i don't even have the words to express how powerful the combination of the images and louie giglio's words were for me as we watched it. the words of a song sung yesterday at restore come to my heart and mind:

Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord God Almighty

who was and is and is to come

with all creation i sing praise to the King of Kings

You are my everything and i will adore you

(revelation song)

06 July 2011

no longer MIA

i am slightly embarrassed at the length of my absence. i intended to take a short break after 40 days of writing but before i knew it the calendar suddenly said it is july. it is hard for me to sum up the past several weeks in words. i finished up my first semester back at school and also completed a summer session course. recently i officially received my letter of acceptance into the physical therapy assistant program. another year of volunteering as a high school youth group leader wrapped up for a summer "break" (do you ever completely break from such a role? i don't think so). college friends returned from their various destinations. i've spent a lot of time in montvale (and surrounding towns) bowling, biking, mini-golfing, swinging in the batting cages, movie-watching, shooting pool, taking walks, shooting hoops, playing xbox and wii, etc etc with a very special someone. i celebrated many birthdays, including mama's 80th and hudson's 3rd on a wonderful week-long vacation to the outer banks. i witnessed two beautiful weddings.

i could go on and on in a list of all that has happened in my absence but i would never remember everything. to sum it up, though, the past several weeks have included countless reminders of God's incredible blessings. He is very much at work in my life in all sorts of dimensions. i am humbled at His love, faithfulness, and desire to have a relationship with someone as flawed as myself.

some photos for your viewing pleasure...in reverse order because, well, that is the way it seems to want to work for me tonight...