take my heart, i lay it down

at the feet of You whose crowned

take my life, i'm letting go

i lift it up to You whose throned

and i will worship You, Lord

only You, Lord

and i will bow down before You

only You, Lord

take my fret, take my fear

all i have, i'm leaving here

be all my hopes, be all my dreams

be all my delights, be my everything

and i will worship You, Lord

only You, Lord

and i will bow down before You

only You, Lord

and it's just You and me here now

only You and me here now

You should see the view

when it's only You

(only You - david crowder band)

sometimes God uses the most unexpected people, the most unexpected times and circumstances and situations, to grab a hold of our attention and speak to our heart. He uses those as his voice to speak to us in the time when we need it most. not necessarily when we want it, but when we need it. 

i went to youth group tonight not expecting a whole lot. not that i expected to be bored or disappointed, but just anticipated the "usual". i have to admit, i don't think my heart has always been in the right place when it comes to youth group and my serving in that role. but tonight, the unexpected came through to me at a time when i needed it to. 

trust. trust God. i don't always have the easiest time trusting people (though i have found that i often end up trusting the most random people), especially not with my life or my heart. sure, i could blame it on past experience. i could use psychology to explain why any certain experience may have led to my having difficulty with trust. most of them would be rational and understandable and justifiable. but i don't want to make excuses. we have to move on from any past hurts or betrayals or disappointments. we have to start new every day and not assume that what happened once will necessarily happen again. 

most of all, i need to know that i can (and should) trust God. i should trust Him always. i should trust Him first and foremost. most other relationships will let us down at one time or another. but God never will. God desires good for me. God desires my heart and my life - He desires me. most of the time, i only give him parts of it, or most of it. but that part that i try to hold onto is what hinders me. my desire to be in control actually causes my downfall. 

thank you, ben, for being so clear about what it means to trust God. thank you for being the voice to stir my heart into re-realizing that i need to give up everything and trust Him. 

i give up my life. i give Him my heart. i hand over my frets and fears. and all i am left to do is to worship and bow down to, to put my hope in a God who loves me and died for me. why wouldn't i trust in that?