day 26: sex

"but i tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. if your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. it is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell."

matthew 5:28-29

we Christians often think and act like the pharisees. the pharisees were extremely legalistic and made sure to obey the many laws very literally. it is just as easy for us to look at the ten commandments and feel okay about ourselves, at least in regard to some of them. i have not murdered. i have never stolen anything. i certainly haven't committed adultery. as we mature we realize that we can kill someone, not literally, with our words or commit adultery with lust. but i don't think too many of us even put ourselves in that category. if we aren't having sex outside of marriage (or outside of our marriage) and we don't struggle with lust or addiction to porn we must be okay, right?

sex is everywhere. our culture is flooded with it. sometimes i am surprised at what is shown on television (on shows and at times that younger children could still be watching), what is allowed in a PG-13 movie, what is talked about on the radio or sung about in songs and then played on the radio, etc. sometimes i am not surprised though and i should be. sometimes i should change the channel or the station, and i don't. i convince myself that it doesn't have an effect on me. maybe it doesn't.

i volunteer as a high school youth group leader and have built relationships with a lot of these students. when you have a relationships with someone you love and trust, you have conversations about very real topics. a few years ago we did a 3-part series that included relationships, dating, and eventually sex. the discussions as a part of this series and the conversations i have had more specifically reveal a mindset that is common to youth today. i don't think it is unique to teenagers but extends even to young adults and maybe even older. we seem to think that so long as we are not actually having sex (which these days needs further definition, but i won't get into), it is okay. anything else is fair game. is this much different than the literal interpretation of "do not commit adultery" in comparison to the idea that lust is sin?

sin is primarily of the heart. when we sin we are saying that we desire our own way rather than what God wants for us. this concept applies to sex but it applies to any other sin that we struggle with too. therefore, we must guard our hearts. proverbs 4:23 says, "above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it."

Lord, help me to guard my heart from things that you do not want for me. if need be, rid my life of the things that tempt me and pull me away from you.