"and do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. simply let your 'yes' be 'yes', and your 'no' be 'no'; anything beyond this comes from the evil one."
matthew 5:36-37
Jesus continues his series of teachings. he taught about anger and the need for reconciliation, he taught about lust and sex, now he continues with a teaching about vows. people were in the habit of making vows and oaths and promises. one would swear by the temple, another by the alter in the temple. a need to emphasize that we are speaking the truth. Jesus brought it up because people were breaking promises and using sacred language casually and carelessly. they made vows and took oaths casually, giving their word while knowing it wouldn't be kept, or swearing falsely in God's name. these oaths, or vows, were common but Jesus tells them not to use them. Jesus says not to use them. their word alone should be enough. if they tell the truth all of the time, it won't be necessary to follow it up with a promise.
can we relate to that? (where do we think pinky promises came from? or swearing on the Bible in court?) i can think of several occasions where i found myself having to add "i promise" as an assurance to someone that i would do what i said. not so much because people don't expect the truth from me, or for me to do what i say, but because we have become conditioned to being lied to. even the people who love us most, who we should be able to count on, lie to us. we eventually expect dishonesty.
i hate being lied to. i would even venture to say that i not only hate lies, but i dislike when someone doesn't tell me the truth without lying. dishonesty is sure to break trust and ruin any relationship i am in. but, do i hold myself to the same standards?
the problem is that we hardly see the problem with lying and don't even consider some of truths is lying or dishonesty. we write them off as harmless to make ourselves feel better. we lie to prevent someone from getting hurt. (is that really loving them though?) we distort the truth or rephrase things to get away with it. we exaggerate. (is that not a form of lying?)
again, it is a sin that deals with the heart. when i am lied to it hurts because the other person, someone who is supposed to love me and care about me, is basically telling me that i don't deserve the truth. when they lie to me, or when i lie to others, we are being selfish. we are saying that we care more about ourselves then the person we lie to or lie about. we want to impress others, make ourselves look good, even if it means making someone else look bad. we lie because we don't want to expose ourselves - who and what we really are. we lie to cover our sins.
every lie drives a wedge in our relationship with others. i admitted that it ultimately destroys whatever relationship i am in because it destroys my ability to trust them. as Christians, lying has even greater consequences. "we erode the relationships with fellow believers that should be some of the strongest, most transparent and honest relationships in our lives." but lies can also damage our witness. it may become a stumbling block for a non-believer.
we must speak the truth in love. our 'yes' must be 'yes' and our 'no' must be 'no'.
Lord, help us to speak the truth about ourselves, about others, and most importantly about you. give us wisdom and integrity to be honest in order to build each other up.
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